sick and tired of it all.......

You know, you can ask, you can beg, you can cry till your blue in the face but sometimes it just doesn't' help or matter to the person you are talking to.

DH ( and the D doesn't stand for what you might think at this time) has pushed me to the edge and just about over. I am so sick of the lies I feel he has told me. When you make a deal with somebody that if they do something you will do something in return, I feel that is as much a lie as an actual lie is. I was told that if I got a second job, DH would keep the house clean and do around the house. That was two years ago and I am still waiting for his end of the deal to be kept. I feel I am killing my self working 60 plus hours a week and get nothing in return for the deal that was made. I was told that "if that money's for the household, I sure don't see it". I responded back that you see that money every week when you are giving the boys lunch money or buying tobacco or eating supper at night. if it weren't for me hiding and rationing it out (as I was told I did), there would be none to give for stuff between the main paydays.

What am I suppose to do, bust my ass for you to sit on yours and complain that there is nothing to eat, no clean clothes, no clean dishes. When all you do is sit on your ass and eat and watch television. And then say you're tired and go to bed at 7:30 pm. I stand on concrete for 4.5 to 8 hours every night for you to be able to do that? And I am wrong to complain about it. I don't think so.
I hate having to pitch an all out fit just to get anything done. And I mean anything. I don't consider the deal being kept on your end when you only wash a load of dishes every other day, wash the clothes that we need for the next day (when there is clothes so deep on the laundry floor that you can't even see the floor and it is dangerous to even walk down there) and MAYBE, and only if it benefits you, you pick up something . Take five minutes to through out the junk mail. MAKE the boys get off their asses and do something. Be a man, a parent, not a friend to them all the time.

I don't' ask for much. I don't ask for cars, I don't' ask for jewelry, I don't ask for fancy clothes. I do ask that you grow the hell up and take responsibility for things. Quit taking the easy way out. Don't pull back into your turtle shell and hide thinking that the problems will go away if you ignore the. Why is it I always feel like I am the one sacrificing everything ( my health, my time, my sanity) and you are trying to figure out a way to get somebody else to do things for you. Is that lazy or what?

I am also tired of being a second class citizen to your sister and mom. You treat me like crap compared to them. You jump when they ask you to do something. You don't say "yeah, I will" you say to them "when do you want me there?" and if there is food involved, OMG get out of your way. Oh, ain't don't tell me that you try every day to lose weight when all you do is sit around the house and eat. If you get up and exercise now and again, you might actually get some results. You can't eat continuously, not exercise and expect the weight to go away cause you will it away.

Enough for today. I am tired and just numb to the whole flippin' thing.

and the Saga continues......

so here I sit and the day is the same as it was yesterday as it was the day before and the day before..........

The bills keep coming, the money keeps going and things are the same.

Final had it out with the other half. Well, I say I had it out. I talked for 20 min and he just sat and stared out the windshield. But for a few hours I felt better.

I hate when the boss picks a favorite. Makes it suck for the rest of the people in the office. The favorites never make mistakes and the rest, well, Katie bar the door............

Enough rambling for the day. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day. Maybe...........................

howdy......

I am needing a why to vent and I figure this is a good way to do it......So let the venting begin........

• Why is it when you get into a relationship, you are promised some things and they never come true. Are all relationships a lie or just the one's I always get into.
• Why is it that the rich get richer and the poor get screwed up the ass at every corner they go around.
• Why is it that no matter what you do, it never seems right?

Well, that is it for the moment. I will go into more detail later. I just wanted to lay some ground work for what is to come.